kelzadiddle: (keep calm and read Wodehouse)
I'm starting to think I should start a 'shit my boyfriend says' section on this journal, because some of the crazy stuff he comes out with is unbelievable. I bring to you all two shining examples, both of which occurred under the same circumstances. We were in bed, it was probably about two o'clock in the morning, and he'd just woken up, but was on the verge of sleep.

Example the first. I was just lying there, minding my own business, trying to get back to sleep after peeling myself off the wall, when all of a sudden he grins and murmurs "tee hee! Homework!"

I glance at him, baffled. "Pardon?"

He pauses, then opens his eyes, looking just as confused. "I think I was dreaming. I was having this dream where you were a teacher."

Said Kelza: "Okay?"

Said Jason: *snore*

Bizarre, right? Example the second. Again, just lying there, minding my own business. I'd woken up for no known reason when he just starts laughing and goes "That's madness!"

"What's madness?" I ask.

"I don't know," says Jason. And then he snores.

I think that sometimes he comes out with this weird stuff, not realising he's actually awake. That last one got me because I really want to know what set him off laughing in the middle of the night and he doesn't remember a thing. What was madness? I must know, dammit! Maybe I didn't hear the capital letter and he was actually talking about Madness, as in the band?

The Prince's Trust - It's Finally Over!

  • Apr. 1st, 2011 at 4:32 PM
kelzadiddle: (Kevin Ayers Still Life With Guitar)
The subject line makes it sound like I've had an overall hateful experience. Perhaps I should reword it. Here's something that might be a little more appropriate...

SUBJECT: The Prince's Trust - I Don't Trust Myself to Get a Proper Job Now That It's Over!!

I kid, I kid. I'm gutted that this is the end of the course. It is a new beginning for all of us, but I'd love to go back to residential, the community project, the final team challenge... I'm going to miss it all terribly. I won't be seeing the people as much, which is sad. I think I might even cave to their demands and get Facebook. Again.

Because I haven't posted anything since Final Team Challenge Day the Second, I'll be putting up a few retrospective posts in coming days. There are a few things I need to cover:-
  1. Final Team Challenge: Day the Third and Last
  2. The Final Presentation (and All The Stuff That Went Into It)
  3. Post-Prince's Trust Celebrations and All That Jazz
  4. Kelza's Accidental and Eccentric Charm Works on a Bloke, Apparently
You read that last one correctly. I don't know if I've mentioned Jason before but he was on Team 44 (Tim and Vicky's previous Team), meaning he did The Prince's Trust Team Programme last year. He did a little bit of volunteering, helping us out since he's got the experience. And I've been hanging out with him these past two days. And everyone (myself included) thinks he fancies me; the proof will come in the relevant post. And it's blinking well baffling.

And and and I'll get to these posts right away. I'm not fond of gaping holes in my journal. It resembles chronological Swiss cheese as it is.

2011 Census, You Are One With the Lulz

  • Mar. 26th, 2011 at 3:33 PM
kelzadiddle: (louis WTF face)
2011 Census, Q17:

"This question is intentionally left blank. Go to Q18."

Dad's answer: "I don't understand the question."
kelzadiddle: (louis WTF face)
It may interest you all to learn that I have recently sailed across the 1,000 journal entries milestone.

This is good. Very good. I have over 1,000 entries now, spanning three/four years of my life. And probably over a hundred A4 pages of handwritten journal still waiting to be typed. Holes to be filled in, and all that jazz.

It's encouraging, especially in the light of my recent lack of activity on here. I see just how far I've come and it spurs me on. Here's to another three/four years, and another thousand entries?

To celebrate, an amusing story from the other night.

On Friday, I got back from St. Helens absolutely knackered. I'd been to a nightclub with Anna the previous night, and had slept on a duvet on Anna's friend's floor. You can probably appreciate how tired I was. So I survived Friday, came home, loafed about and had an early night. I got to sleep at about 9PM.

The next thing I knew, I was sat up in the dark, on the phone. A male voice, who I was unable to recognise through the fog of exhaustion, was talking on the other end. Apologising for phoning me up. I mumbled a farewell and he hung up. Lay down. Realised what had just happened, and sat up again. I couldn't - and still can't - recall the phone ringing. Or picking it up for that matter. One minute I was dozing off and the next - boom! I was on the phone.

Turns out it was Alex. God knows what he phoned for. If he'd phoned accidentally he would have immediately hung up, rather than stay on the line and let me answer. As for me, I clearly sleep-answered. It's not the first time I've done stuff in my sleep.

You never know, I could be asleep right now. *shifty eyes*

I will be in an hour or so, anyway. I'm off to bed! Later, chaps, and sweet dreams to you all!
kelzadiddle: (Caution! Zombies Ahead! Roadsign)
Before I go off to bed to become boring, I thought I'd update you all with a rather interesting occurrence that chose to interrupt the usual ebb and flow of my daily life.

Earlier on, I was on the computer, perusing Twitter and LiveJournal into the wee small hours - as you do - when there came a knock at the door. The time was about half nothing in the morning. The knocking? Sharp, quick, urgent.

Needless to say I reacted to this much like one might react upon being told that they were actually of the other gender. We don't get many knockings of the door in the daytime, let alone the middle of the night. Naturally I was suspicious. My immediate thought was of teenage louts, playing knock and run, perhaps, or waiting to pound the unlucky answerer of said door with snowballs immediately upon opening. Perhaps even a gang of burglars, planning to barge in and harvest our television should we answer their knock. So I waited, and contemplated the possibilities.

It came again, said knocking, with a desperation that I simply couldn't ignore. Around here, even the boldest chav is in bed by seven (such is small town life), and I'd immediately got this strange feeling; I knew instantly that this was a genuine call, and quite an urgent one. I went to the door.

Walking through the hall, I saw a faint blue glow beyond the frosted window of our front door; a bulky shadow silhouetted in it. At the shadow's chest, a pallid white square; a screen. And as I approached the door, I heard the crackly tones of a radio.

I took the chain off and opened the door, but I already knew who it was. And I was right. A lone policeman, car parked up behind him, peered into the house.

"Sorry to disturb you, miss, but we received a call saying that there's been a stabbing here?"

Yes sir, I'm afraid I had a disagreement with a bottle of tomato sauce... )


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