I Need To Rant.

  • Dec. 10th, 2012 at 9:27 AM
kelzadiddle: (Default)

I don't know how I'm going to face my fiancé's brother today without exploding, ugh. He's such a selfish manchild. Found out today that his mum only went to the hospital on Wednesday after her stroke Tuesday - and he brought someone round while she was suffering the effects; I.e. speech impairment and weakened left side. Oh, and they stayed the night, too. And he came to the fucking pub quiz and made merry while his mum was in hospital. I am so fucking furious at him right now; and I was pissed off at him already for basically being a total sponge, not giving his mum any free time and letting her do everything for him.

This guy is 30 YEARS OLD. And he has his OWN FUCKING HOUSE. And he stays with his mum every day now, despite complaining about having no free time when she had no choice but to live with him, lets her do his washing, cooking, cleaning etc, generates massive fucking piles of dishes for her to do and expects her to get him up for college. Oh, did I mention he expects her to sleep on the small couch while he takes the big one because the small one "makes him ache"? She even admitted that he was stressing her out and I'll bet that he was a massive factor in her stroke.

I am livid. And I plan on having words with him. I'll be diplomatic, but as soon as he pulls any of his defensive I-have-the-right-to-be-here-it's-not-my-fault-I'm-the-victim bullshit, I'm gonna pull out the big guns. And I'm beyond the point now of caring what he thinks of me afterwards. I was worried that saying anything would have him brand me "the bitch my brother is going to marry" but to be honest he's driving me, Jason and his mum crazy, and I've learned all too well that what upsets you must be dealt with. I'm gonna tell him to pack up all his stuff and get out of the house.

Also, my inactivity this past month was due to NaNoWriMo. I managed 66k! Woo! My novel is currently 580 pages long and a grand total of 174000 words approximately. I'm planning to have it first-drafted and typed up by the end of April, and in the other 2013 NaNo events (Camp NaNoWriMo in June and August, and NaNoWriMo itself) I will be finishing 'The Chronicles of Stan' and shifting a hefty chunk of 'You Know You Got (No) Soul'.

Posted via LiveJournal app for iPhone.

NaNo '12's Coming Up And I'm Braindead...

  • Oct. 26th, 2012 at 9:59 PM
kelzadiddle: (OMNOMNOMNOMNOM Ten)
Good news! Two months, three letters and about five million phone calls since I first made my claim for Job Seeker's Allowance, they have finally confirmed that the required letter from university was received. Now I just need to wait to see how and when they will reopen my claim - they said I might have to fill in another application form, but hopefully that won't be necessary. It's not my bloody fault that the letter was sent off late, and it certainly isn't my fault that the Job Centre took so long to actually realise it had arrived!

Oh, and apparently my money will be backdated, new form or not. Phew. That means I can get some better-fitting clothes for an interview and/or work, and I can set up some pet insurance for the ratties and get them registered with a vet. That will put me at ease because I worry constantly about their health.

Speaking of which, I don't think Boffin and Barnaby are well. In the last fortnight they've both been showing symptoms of a respiratory infection. I'm hoping it's not Mycoplasmosis, which requires lifelong care with expensive medication - though if it is, I'm more than willing to work out a budget that allows for their treatment. In the meantime, while I can't get said medication, I'm keeping them warm and well fed with fresh fruit and veggies, as well as a mixture of green tea with lemon and honey which is supposed to do them good and encourage them to drink more. Oh, and I'm cleaning their cage obsessively - a wipe down every day with a wet cloth and full on disinfection every two or three days with boiling water, white vinegar and a rat-friendly disinfectant. So far their symptoms seem to be getting a bit better. Hopefully by the time I get paid they won't be any worse.

I'm preparing to put around £200 aside for their check-up and treatment. Maybe a bit more, depending on what vet I can find. The rest I'll set aside for an emergency. I've learned all too well this last year how crappy things can get if you don't put any cash away for an emergency.

Anyway, what have I been up to? Nothing much. I've divided my time between reading (1Q84 Book Three by Haruki Murakami), playing Minecraft (the Adventure Update came out on the Xbox! Yay!), being with Jason, looking after Boffin and Barnaby and planning my NaNo '12 novel! I can't remember if I've written about this before but I'm taking the notecards approach this time round - cutting up A4 paper into 8 pieces, each of which I will write random plot ideas as well as my established plot points, before arranging it all into some kind of order. This way, I feel I have the direction of a plan guiding me, without the restrictions of, say, just writing a synopsis down in a notepad. If I have a spontaneous idea while writing, I can just throw it in there without upsetting the whole thing. my NaNo 2009 went swimmingly using the very same methods.

The only issue I'm having is a slight creative drought. I have all my main plot points written down now; I just need a whole load of crazy random stuff to chuck in now; the stuff that makes my novel the freewheeling load of nonsense that it is. Maybe I should sit down tomorrow and read through the whole thing to see if there are any plot threads I can pick up...

I have to do well this year. I haven't actually written anything properly since NaNoWriMo last year. If I can make NaNo 2012 a success, it would be a massive step towards kicking this infernal depression and taking my life back. Plus, it would be a big help for my novel; this is the one I want to finish first, and NaNo 2012 could be the big boost towards completion it needs. Maybe I'll even be able to continue with it through to completion this time. I hope so. And then I can begin rewriting. And rewriting again. And rewriting again.

Tomorrow Jason and I are going to a Halloween movie night at Mike's, and then on Monday we're heading off to Southport again, back to the Scarisbrick Hotel! This is where we celebrated our first anniversary back in April, and this time we're going to celebrate the 13th anniversary of Caroline and Alan, some of Jason's family's friends. I'm really looking forward to it; it's going to be a much-needed break, and a great workout too. Going away means we'll be doing a ton of walking around, and this time we'll be making full use of the hotel's pool and spa facilities. I can't wait to see how many calories I'll burn! I'll be bringing my novel plan and a few pages as well, because NaNoWriMo will actually begin on our last night there! It would be great to get a few pages done in the hotel before bed (after midnight, of course!) and some on the car ride home.

But first, however, I need to plan...

Oh My God... I Swam!

  • Oct. 8th, 2012 at 9:10 AM
kelzadiddle: (Caution! Zombies Ahead! Roadsign)
It's too early. Jason stayed at mine last night but we had to get up early since he has another work placement, this time transporting medical records around Warrington Hospital. I am le tired, but I'm terrible at going back to bed once I'm awake. I'll just lie there, tired, but totally unable to sleep. Later on, I'm going to his to stay over.

Anyway, yesterday was one of those days where I accidentally and unintentionally got in way more exercise than I had to. First off, swimming. If I go alone, I usually get out after about seventy minutes. But my younger brother Ashley decided he wanted to come along, and time flew much quicker since I had company. I ended up staying in the pool a full ninety minutes, only getting out because I was tired. Then, it takes me an hour to walk to the pool and back, so that was two hours and a half of exercise already. Then, Jason and I went to Sian's later on to watch a couple of films. Dad drove us there but we walked back, which took 30 minutes.

At the end of the day I was so knackered that I actually don't remember getting into bed last night. It usually takes me a full hour to get to sleep but I was out as soon as my head hit the pillow. I'm sleeping much better now that I'm more active.

So, swimming. I wasn't allowed to borrow a float but I'm actually kind of glad I didn't, because I did my usual thing of holding onto the side and swimming with the rest of me, and I noticed a definite improvement - as in, I could keep myself afloat much better, and I wasn't gripping the side as much as skimming my hand along it in case I needed to grab on to steady myself. I just did my usual laps back and forth along the side, from the shallow end to 1.25m (the limit for non-swimmers) and back again, practicing a half-breaststroke with each arm in alternation. I'm getting faster at swimming as well.

And guess what? I swam unaided as well! It was only for about three strokes, but I managed it! So in three sessions, I've managed to swim by myself a little bit. Hopefully I can manage to get a little bit further each time I go.

So, yesterday I managed to burn off 1683 calories. I had to eat 2237 to make sure I actually netted some. Which was easy; I made up for the calories I'd burned at Sian's place later, with all the food I brought to accompany our film. We watched Troll 2, which is so awful it would take me forever to review, and then a DVD of one of Sian's favourite childhood films, based on Through the Looking Glass.

I'm thinking of starting to plan for NaNoWriMo today, and I think it shall just be a continuation of The Great Couch Happening of '69. I need to plan, otherwise the novel will just fizzle out, but at the same time I need a plan which allows for some of the spontaneous craziness that makes my novel what it is. And I believe the best way to do that would be to plan in the form of notecards. I did this a couple of years ago when doing my NaNo '09, Crimson Dawn, which actually turned out quite well - I had a lot of fun writing it.

Maybe I should use notecards for my other project too... I want to revive the fantasy-romance novel that I started working on when I was thirteen - I have the storyline set out quite well in my head - and I've tried to plan it a few times just by typing out a synopsis, to no avail - when I try to write it down in plan form it just gets overly detailed and tedious. If I tried to just write it from my mind, it would just fizzle out. I need to have the plot written in some form before me, like a roadmap. Put it this way, you'd never travel to somewhere you'd never gone before without a map. My novel's the place, the plan is the map. I've never written my novel before, so I need some form of a plan to make sure I don't get lost and give up a couple of chapters in.

Right, so now I just need to find some plain paper, cut it up into eighths and get to work.

I'm Back! ... Again!

  • Oct. 3rd, 2012 at 12:33 PM
kelzadiddle: (Write Like a Mofo)
Well then! It's been a while! Everybody should thank [livejournal.com profile] darkspirited1 for dragging me back. I've been thinking about LiveJournal for a while now, wondering whether it was appropriate to return for the five quintillionth time, and whether or not there'd be a digital angry mob with pixel torches and electronic pitchforks waiting to skewer me for my negligence. As it is there's only a keyboard awaiting me, and Semagic.

What have I been doing these past three months, you ask? After the horrible ol' business that was - er, is - 2012, I've just been recovering, trying to get over my depression, and getting my life back on track. I did keep a non-Internet diary for a little while, which I will probably type up and post here backdated to fill in the gaps, and I have a Tumblr for when I really needed to rant or post cute pictures of my rats... but after nearly six years of LiveJournal, I guess Tumblr and my diary weren't enough.

Summary of my last three months under the cut for your convenience... )

And... that's pretty much it. I think. These three months have been pretty uneventful otherwise; I've just been going to pub quizzes, chilling out with Jason, playing the XBox and having moodswings. Hopefully I can get more active on here again, because I love my LJ too much to let it fade away. And I love you guys, of course. The time I've been away I've missed you all a lot <3


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