Guess who knows about my excursion to Ireland now? Dad remembered out of the blue earlier that he has my older sister, Gail, added as a friend on Facebook. He contacted her; she phoned us and then phoned Mum who said 'yay!', and then she phoned us again. My surprise is down the drain, but I now have a secure means of transport (i.e. my stepdad) and I've saved £35.

As it happens, Mum is in Newcastle for the summer, staying at the caravan at Mourneview. I'm so glad she still has it, as it means she has somewhere nice she can escape to virtually for free. So, she's willing to have me over (Gail's exact words were 'over the moon'), which means I can have a proper holiday!

Wow. When on earth did you last hear the words 'Kelza' and 'holiday' put together? "Kelza ruins neighbours' summer holiday by playing loud music"? "Mr. Holiday accuses Kelza of performing unethical tests regarding black holes and his favourite nail clippers"? And why can't I think of an example which doesn't involve me causing other people bother?

Let it be known, world: Kelza is going on holiday, for the first time in about five years. I actually can't believe it!

Now all that's left is to pack tomorrow, go and hope my ID gets me onto the plane...